It's Friday morning February 5th. You're reading the final product almost a week later. No, I'm not that good and that on top of my to-do list that I'm spending my morning writing my blog for next week. I'm writing my blog for next week because I'm pissed. I get more pissed as the morning goes on. I drove home in the snow to walk the dog pissed. Not a wise thing to do.
What could have set me off? I try to stay level headed. I put anger and frustration into my workouts and curb any vocal outbursts as much as possible. When I'm lucky enough to take Friday Morning Mash Up, my body typically feels empty, but I know I can draw from others and find what I need to get through the class. Today, however, it was exceptionally quiet. I don't know why it bothered me, but it did. Maybe it was the athlete in me from days long ago knowing I could look to the right and left of me see shared suffering but rally around. Encouragement, support, and camaraderie got my teammates and me through the most challenging of workouts. This Friday, in a partner based workout, with the volume of the music low what did I hear? Heavy breathing? Sure. Clanging weight? Yes. Encouraging words? Nope. Nothing. The athlete, the former coach, the employee of CPC, the class attendee looking for a way to get through a tough workout had had enough. I had to say something, to which, the response was laughter.
Laughter? Huh. I would have expected...better yet I'll rephrase...I would have hoped for a rally. A realization that the room was dead quiet, the energy level was flat, and we were only 15mins into class. Instead, for reasons I can only guess at, I got laughter. I got jokes about being nagged enough at home. I got excuses not results.
More of the same at the end of class, but, this time, no one had trouble responding to my outburst halfway through class. No one had trouble "foam rolling" making it seem like they were sooooo exhausted from yet another tough class and comparing me to spouses at home (but just wives) who ask for more of this or more of that. HERE is where I get pissed. It's right HERE that I turn into the angry red emoji face. As a strong, independent, woman who can hold her own and has absolutely no problem toeing the line and asking the men in class to do the same I was compared to a nagging house-wife. Nice. Thanks for that.
I'm not writing this to step up on the feminist soapbox or to imply I want an apology. Far from it. I'm writing this because the same damn thing keeps happening. Subscribers walk in the door with high expectations for the best. We do our damnedest to deliver. We program, cue, play DJ, set up, break down, and ask for more out of each of you. That's our job. That's my job. Whether I'm taking a class with you side by side, or the one holding the clipboard, I'm still going to ask for more. I'm not your wife creating a "Honey Do List". While I am a woman I am also an athlete, a competitor, and a coach wanting to get the most and the best out of the people around me. I want that in return. Hold yourself to a higher standard. Find your limit and go past it. Support the others around you that are struggling and for godsakes bring something to the table on Friday.
SK
No comments:
Post a Comment